So....this is the
shortened internet version, and it’s still long! Feel free to just look at the pictures and some bulleted highlights at the end. :)
Since the beginning, although the due date was March 28 or
31 depending on how it was calculated, I had prepared myself to go until April
3 or 4. That would follow the pattern of 40 weeks plus a few days, like the
last two babies. However, all along I had so many less signs of impending labor
the previous weeks, and yet was so much more uncomfortable (or even in pain,
with my pelvic floor issues), it felt like baby had zero idea of vacating any
time soon.
My mom came all the way from Tennessee via Canada when I was
39-40 weeks, then back the day before 41 weeks for another week. It had seemed
unthinkable she wouldn’t hold a baby during all that time, but here we were,
day after uneventful day. I had wound everything down by now, partially because
my body was just DONE. The tiredness and aches and pains and barely staying
mobile in between chiropractic visits... Ugh. Each day seemed like two.
Trip to the bay at low tide about a week before the birth
Another relaxing visit to Birch Bay State Park, the day before going into labor
As the weekend approached, I desperately hoped something
would happen while Jake was home from work. Two out of three had been Sunday
babies, so chances seemed good!
On Saturday, April 6, Jake and I had an extremely rare
morning of waking together quietly and calmly...and rested! Thanks to Nana, who
had taken everyone downstairs and somehow kept them quiet for us. Jake remarked
it was his best night’s sleep since kids!
I made my version of pancakes and play-doh for the girls.
They played for hours with Nana supervising, which bought Jake and I time for
rare computer work. He did our taxes start to finish, yeah! Another thing out
of the way before baby. I washed our sheets. There was an essential oils
meeting at our pastor’s house over lunch. It had sounded appealing the day
before, but now I decided the last thing I wanted was to chat with people
normally! It was also terribly uncomfortable to squeeze into the car and drive.
So, I cut Jake’s hair, which took about an hour because our hard working
clippers died after just a few runs.
Then, he cut the grass with the reel mower while I googled “labor
inducing foods”. What crazy dishes and stories!! I sent an article to Jake and
he said there were several ideas during a work meeting the day before. Jump on
a trampoline, eat Chinese food, eat Eggplant Parmigiana (worked for someone)...
I got a good hour long nap in the afternoon. So great I got all
the rest! Afterwards, I told Jake there was no food delivery company that
delivered to our address. I said I was thinking I should try Eggplant
Parmigiana. He immediately started looking for restaurants. We found it on
Olive Garden’s menu. Mom came up and we told her what we were doing. She
offered to either pick it up and bring it home, or to make some homemade. I
said we had too many leftovers. She offered to keep the girls while we ran out
to Olive Garden – bingo! Our thoughts exactly.
Leslie, the midwife, had said at the 40 week prenatal (2 back) that
maybe we needed another date night before baby showed. She actually messaged
while we planned the outing, asking how my day was going. I had been so grateful
she wasn’t writing me constantly, which I would have felt as pressure. This was
maybe the first time she was checking in. I told her about the busy, productive
day, and that we were going out for Eggplant Parmigiana! She gushed that she
was glad I was enjoying the last days of being pregnant, that all of this was
part of the baby’s birth story! I thought yeah...wouldn’t that be great. (And
here it is!!)
Jake was rushing me to go, but I had to find something decent to
fit my body, sigh. Black maternity dress from back of the closet...so he
changed to a black shirt. As we pulled out, I told him resorting to food was either a crazy idea, or the best idea ever - if it worked! Cloudy drive to Bellingham...quoted 15 minute wait
but seemed more... Easy order! Jake ordered from the specials card,
and I was relieved they had Eggplant Parmigiana. Can’t imagine it’s popular,
although it was in the “classics” section of menu. Enjoyed the salad and breadsticks and I
was still hungry by the time it arrived. I checked the time at some point and
it was 6:28. SO TASTY!! I ate just over half of the eggplant (fried! hot!
cheesy! marinara sauce!) and none of the pasta, which was half the plate. I was
hoping I hadn’t overdone it, but wanted enough to do the labor trick, ha. And
then Jake splurged by ordering us the Chocolate Brownie Lasagna, which was uh-mazing. Hit
the spot! I was just pleasantly stuffed as we left in the rain.
We got back and the girls were watching their promised
movie. Boys were on their way back from a church youth concert and fun day in
Seattle. Nana asked if anything had happened, and I reminded her (same as Jake
in the car) that it seems you have to allow up to 48 hours. She then asked a bit
desperately if we could go out for ice cream, they were stir crazy. It was bath
night for the littles, but that sounded more fun, even though I had already had
my dessert. It was maybe 7:30 and dusky when we left again. Even though it was a
chilly night, the parking lot was full and there was a long line. Our crew got
a lot of stares...
When we got home, the boys were back from Seattle and their
friend was there, too. Jake began talking to him right inside the door about
old cars and soon they were in the garage revving Jake’s. Nana and I got the
girls down.
At 9:30, Callie was already quiet, so Nana and Sophia signed
off. Mom asked if anything was up, and of course NOW I wished I had sounded
more optimistic, but at the time I just said, “I feel some things, but I’m not
going to say anything, because everyone thinks it’s imminent then”. And, “Oh,
baby has hiccups!” Every night, I already hurt so much, occasionally with Braxton
Hicks, that it was hard to say if it was anything more promising.
Lydia called me back to her room, and I was with her until
around 9:45. Jake finished with the boys and we sat and chatted. As I
maneuvered myself up from the bed, he asked how I was doing. I said “Hm. [long
pause] That one was more painful. And maybe in my back.” I said I was missing
my long relaxing baths, but would continue to shower only (to not stop
potential labor). I also observed the sign that had been missing until now—baby
was quiet, what mine always do before labor starts, even though night is the most
active time.
We chatted and got ready for bed while I noted that the “Braxton
Hicks” had a sharp edge to them, and were maybe even becoming regular. I still
wasn’t calling it or anything. We had the birth pool and
pump in our room now, from two nights ago when things seemed promising after a
big evening playing outside with the kids, but I didn’t think it should be put
up yet. As usual! Jake laughed at me while brushing his teeth. But I left my makeup
on, remembering how off guard I was caught with Callie’s quick nighttime arrival.
At 11:18, Jake got in bed, and I decided to get the midwife
in the loop. I told her I hadn’t timed them, but they were becoming rhythmic
and painful, sometimes stretching to different parts of my torso.
When I laid down, I felt what was going
on even more. Jake got up to get the heating pad out of my doula bag for me while
I went to the bathroom again. It was probably 11:40 before we stopped talking,
and I was just going to get overheated with the pad. Now was feeling like I’d
be waking him soon to help! In all honesty, I didn’t want him to “leave” me to
sleep, as I faced what was ahead, but he would do better getting some sleep....
I kept thinking of Callie’s birth, as this nearly mimicked the timing exactly.
The story was, “Jake sleeps until birth time!” Could I do it again?
I was surprised at how amped I was, either just thinking
about it or literally hormonally, to be able to relax enough to sleep. Plus, it
was just too hard with the contractions. So...I started timing them! I deleted
the set from a doula client, and after 7 contractions, I had every 4 minutes,
lasting exactly 1 minute. I figured it would be kept up for an hour...time to
head to hospital! Only, I was heading downstairs to thaw some stuff and get
ready for a joyous postpartum at home!
Then, back to bed. COULD. NOT. SLEEP. Come ON!! I pushed
terrifying thoughts out of my head of Lydia’s marathon birth. This simply had
to be a Callie version now, if I couldn’t rest first. I really wasn’t exhausted
that night though, with the uplifting fun evening after feeling so depressed,
and a good night the night before + hour nap. Thankfully!! I kept thinking of
things I could be telling/asking someone to do. Doula brain!
So around 1, I gave up and went downstairs for a labor
popsicle, then put up my hair how I wanted it. I was pleased that again
everyone was in their normal spot, totally unaware of birth taking place. The
boys were probably tuckered after their road trip. They had actually been gone
the two previous nights, to the cousins (on spring break) and Seattle. I
pondered if showering would wake Jake, and as they again piled one on top of
the other when I got active, taking my breath away, AND I’d had bloody show, I
decided to go ahead and wake him. But first, write the midwife before things
got crazier!
Me at 1:14am: I’m going to go ahead and call it! It’s real
labor. Contractions are EXACTLY like with the last, who also had to rotate from
my right to left side. I think/hope that’s what’s going on now.
After some back and forth, where I also marveled that
instead of the slow 6-10pm warm up like with Callie, I jumped straight into the
deep end, she said “Sounds good. I’m happy to head your way when you need me.
Sounds like you feel this is actual labor.”
Jake rolled over as I wrote and I thought he opened his
eyes, so I took advantage to mention I already needed him. Just over 1 ½ hours
rest this time! He had said that when/if I woke him, his first task would be
filling the pool, so he began, and we hoped the loud pump wouldn’t wake anyone.
(It didn’t!)
I replied at 1:25am “I’ve woken Jake and he’s working on the
pool. I’m going to time next but they are quite close together
I’d say to come”
I looked at my “when in labor list”. Most had
been done. Then I decided I really needed to try water relief/distraction,
although I was none too optimistic by this point. So Jake diverted the flow
back to the shower. I put down my bath mat so I could kneel and conserve my
rapidly waning (or, redirected) energy. I couldn’t talk easily. Things were
picking up, for sure. I timed contractions a bit. They were one after another
(I think 2 ½ minutes apart and lasting over a minute), even in the water. I
tried to check dilation and decided it was maybe a 4 or 5. Was that all? I’d
already called the birth team. What if I was still that far off? I decided to
disregard everything and just focus on labor, ha. At least baby was FINALLY
COMING, however long or short it took!
After not long, I realized that at this rate the tub would
never be filled, because I wasn’t going to get out. I explained to Jake in
between rushes that I could have the water beating on my back IN the tub and
kill two birds with one stone. I was also seeing how I was going to get way overheated
quickly, so this was going to be interesting. Maybe I’d just not fill it much,
since I was also conscious of waiting until the right time to get in. I had
experienced some shaking a couple of times already though, so I thought I might
be in transition.
Stepping into the tub (1:45am?), even just a couple of
inches, was a cool feeling, and we reminisced how it had been 4 years this
month since I had! From there, seeking good distraction, I turned on “Birth In
the Glory”, but couldn’t hear it over the spraying water. Jake turned on ocean sounds,
our plan after listening to crashing waves at the bay Friday night. He mainly
sat by me now, as I had plenty of requests, even though it took great effort to
communicate now as I moved into Laborland.
He opened the window (was probably 45 degrees or cooler
outside!), got me a second labor popsicle at some point, a cold rag for my
neck, and blew the little blue fan on me that I’d asked mom to get me from
Target, sensing I would get overheated for this birth. And yet I wanted the
water hot on my back. After a while, I was surprised that I didn’t want it hot
on my back. I signaled no more fan at some point. Then yes, but to the side,
not right on my face.
I kept marveling at it myself. Maybe because I’ve served 6
women in labor since my last, and I have lots of ideas of comfort measures?
Whatever the reason, when I thanked/apologized to Jake afterwards for keeping
him so busy, and also changing my mind somewhat quickly throughout labor as
things intensified, he thanked ME for all the direct commands! Says he thrives
on them. Should make this his very favorite birth, ha!
I was surprised to feel baby STILL moving around and stretching
into my ribs. Such familiar feelings—her “moves and grooves”, as Leslie put it
at all of our prenatals. Other than Lydia having hiccups, I can’t remember
feeling movement during labor.
If I had a mantra this time, I think it was simply telling
myself “These are manageable, it’s manageable, manageable...”, trying to not
focus on the previous or upcoming contraction, but simply the current. I
thought of clients who had chanted something during contractions, but I
couldn’t talk then, except keep up a positive internal dialogue. A couple of times I "checked in" to see if I needed to breathe better, or release any tension below/remind
myself to relax (common challenges), but that really wasn’t an issue.
Journeying through some “Birthing From Within” pain management methods kept me
entertained, if you can call it that. I focused on the pain and how it
was—finding it’s edges, the center, studying how it felt—but I think my
favorite was the Non-Focused Awareness. I wished for more sounds around to
observe, but still used it for several contractions. For a couple, I focused on
the wave video instead of my body. I was often breathing hard and very focused
in between contractions. I was starting to get sleepy, but nothing as miserable
as I’ve felt at times. I think the speed at which everything was happening was
keeping me alert, even with no sleep!
At some point, Jake said my mom was up and sitting at the
top of the stairs. She woke when Sophia went to the bathroom at some point, and
realized something was happening so got up.
Around 2:10 maybe, I checked my phone to see when I had
written Leslie, feeling like she should be here by now, even living 45 minutes away (day time drive). I learned later that
Jake did the same thing at some point. I had managed to message her at 1:57 in
between contractions that the door was unlocked, something I’d reminded Jake to
do on a trip downstairs.
Sometime after 2, I got more vocal and some involuntary
new sounds came. Jake recognized the shift, experienced birth partner that he
is, and for the first time I got nervous that we were doing this alone again. I
kept looking up through the bathroom door to the bedroom door to see it open and
in walk Leslie and/or Rosette. Partly it seemed like an intimate,
middle-of-the-night thing we had going on, and I wanted to be prepared for
someone to suddenly enter our space and maybe upset our balance or change the
routine. It helped to chant “OH OH OH” through the peaks of some strong long
ones.
Leslie slipped in quietly at 2:30, stooping down at the
bathroom door and giving a happy little wave. A welcome sight! Rosette, former
RN and her assistant, came in shortly after as they continued to set up in the
bedroom. I could barely ask Jake “Does my mom want to come in? She can”. He
reported back that she did not want to, was fine waiting outside. She later
told me she was praying and timing contractions.
I figured Leslie would have a list to work down of things to
check on me and baby. I had the thought “FINALLY, I experience what a US
midwife does in labor!” However, she is quite hands off, which is why I chose
her. It was awhile before she came in and asked if she could check baby’s heart
tones, and that was all. She stayed outside, saying Jake and I were working beautifully
together. Later she said that when she arrives to such an active labor, she
doesn’t want or need to interrupt.
At some point near the end I thought Jake should know, “It
hurts all the time, even in between, I’m just too worn out to make sounds!” My
body was working hard and fast.
After a few minutes, I could finally verbalize a growing
thought to Jake “Does she need to come in and do anything?” He went out and
asked her. She came in and asked how I was doing, if I needed anything. I
looked up at her dazed and said “I just like to know when I can push, to not do
it too early...” She immediately replied “Then don’t push. Just let your body
do it’s thing, and breathe the baby out. If there is a lip of a cervix, there
will be a pinched feeling, and you just wait.” Oh yes, right! That’s been my
game plan since the last baby, and it sure worked with her. I was glad for the
reminder.
I also assured her, “I don’t think it’s time yet, I’m not
quite there”. I think it wasn’t but one or two rushes later when I might have
even mentioned out loud to Jake that I wasn’t sure if my uterus had changed how
it was contracting. Sure enough, it was! Amazing to remember feeling that
obvious change to Stage Two! I also sensed it with Callie, but was too out of
it to realize with the first two. I felt a ton of pressure and downward movement,
and that long powerful contraction busted my water! I was kneeling at the edge
of the tub and opened my eyes to the shocking site of the water moving out from
under me like from a whirlpool jet. It took two tries to gasp it out
“Water...Broke!”
There was that familiar stretching and bulging! Yep, this
was getting real, really fast! I barely got out to Jake with a wave of my hand
while my eyes were closed and focusing—GO! GET! SOPHIA! He blasted up from the
tub ledge as if shot from a rocket. The picture of her walking in, rubbing her
eyes with the light, and hair all crazy... My dream was happening, and Sophia’s
much hoped for moment, too—she was at her next sibling’s birth!! I suppose that’s
when my mom came in.
After that first push down, I felt like knees was not the
way to be for some reason, so I threw myself around into a sitting position.
Good I had the soft back of the tub to rest on. Otherwise, my whole bottom was
screaming at me! Felt like it was already been torn to shreds. I think there
was another contraction that seemed to bring the head right there. Maybe I even
felt the head, but it wasn’t out. I realized it was big and would need another
contraction. I’m not sure if I was pushing with them or just carried away with
what my body was already doing. Either way, I knew I needed a ton of force to
get this one out. Definitely not a “butter birth”, painless Callie experience,
where I didn’t even realize she was already being born. This one took
monumental effort and my body was working HARD. A couple of times the pool spun
under me and I hoped I wasn't blacking out. Not sure what that was—from pain, or tiredness, or hormones. I kept
thinking about all of the advice to back things down and work slowly so that
tissues can stretch. But man, I was feeling stretched beyond the max already,
and the pain.... All I could think of was both the joy and relief delivering
the head would bring, and didn’t have to wait long! There was some debate and
deliberating afterwards how her head delivered. At some point it was face up, a bigger probability due to the anterior placenta.
We waited a while for the next push, and I remembered
waiting for Lydia’s body to be born. Now I was just starting to think “AHHHH
BOY OR GIRL?!?!?!” I was so over waiting for the surprise.
2:52am: That feeling of the body moving through and twisting
is like none other, and that’s an understatement! I remembered that I wanted to
bring the head up slowly and did it as slowly as I could while so excited to
find out if we had a son or daughter, and feel that little body on the OUTSIDE
finally!
She's here!!!!!
In the pictures, it’s huge smiles all around. My main thought was how
different this little person looked, like I didn’t know him/her at all. Guess I
was expecting a repeat?! Such a unique face, with more vernix than any of the
others, which was unexpected given the “over baking”. I didn’t waste any time
saying “Let’s look!” and Jake helped me maneuver her slippery body and the big
pulsing cord to where we could peek. ANOTHER GIRL!!! Wow, how in the world. Not
following my grandmother and mother’s paths of 3 girls then boy. Jake was
ecstatic, it was just what he most wanted. FOUR girls. We were set for that! He
greeted her by name, Anastasia.
Baby was a bit fussy, occasionally screaming out.
Okkaayyy...definitely more feisty than Callie, and more like the first two!
(She was calm the rest of the day.) Also now began the no fun part of waiting for the placenta, with Leslie asking
for more towels for baby, helping adjust her and keep her above the water,
which was at least low, and me grimacing with after pains. Finally, I was
feeling faint so Leslie called for a clamp and Jake took the honor of cutting
the cord about 25 minutes post delivery. He got a turn with baby while I got
settled and was given some tasty tea. I had juiced oranges for afterwards, and
this was added to cramp bark tea for a tasty warm concoction.
Jake put the placenta, which he said looked a good size, in
the fridge to encapsulate later. Now to cuddle baby again! Finally the pain was
subsiding and I wondered if maybe I had emerged unscathed from that intense
birth and delivery process. The “after pains” were no joke though. I did actually have a
small tear, but no stitches needed.
It seemed like everyone was running around for hours to
clean up! Talk of sump pumps and hoses and towels and gauze... And regular
vital checks for me and baby. The newborn exam happened a little over an hour after birth. During that I saw the sun coming up through the bathroom window. A new day, without wondering when baby would arrive!
The weight of 8 pounds, 14 ounces, has been questioned. The
midwife is trying to unravel the mystery of her scale, so I’ll report back. She
might have been closer to 8 pounds, 7 ounces. The last two were 8 pounds 1
ounce, and I know she was more than that. Her head circumference was 14.5
inches—¾ inch bigger than the last baby (Callie’s HC was average).
*After comparing her birth scale and the scale she brought to postpartum visits, the midwife determined birth weight to be 8 pounds, 9 ounces.
Newborn exam with midwife, big sister looking on
Nana and Sophia had gone back to bed around 5:30 and got in
several hours before the other kids woke. For some (great) reason, they went
longer on this birth night/morn.
The midwife and assistant were packed up and left around
6:15, 3 ½ hours after baby’s birth. Their one concern had been baby’s high-ish
temperature, so they checked it one more time before leaving, having left the
door open for cooler air circulation while loading their stuff, and it was
lower. I was told to take it every few hours and leave her unwrapped and in
diaper only. Poor babe! I’m not Bolivian in my clothing methods, but I did feel
sorry for her and her cool skin, although her temp often was around 99. After a
couple of days, Leslie decided it was not sign of an infection. She just runs
hot, like her dada!
Speaking of, our resident nail-cutter-expert
(Jake) was already cutting her little claws at 6am. He went back to sleep at
6:35.
My adrenaline was still so high, I didn’t sleep much. Baby Ana did,
but I did the “light sleep baby by my side” number. Shortly after 9, the girls
had finished breakfast and Jake woke the boys. Everyone trooped in to see/meet
baby! My first meal was oatmeal, which I’ve had every day
at some point in the births of all four.
The kids coming in Sunday morning
Checking someone out
Nana getting a good look
Grandparents and cousins meeting the newest little one!
Aunt Amy meeting Ana
After all of the stress in having to change from my dear
doula/midwife friend in Tennessee, with a doula assistant and friend I also
admire (a dozen children between them!), I am so glad that our pastor’s wife here
told me about Leslie. She has been super attentive to us these last weeks, and her
role at the birth was how I’d hoped. I birthed my baby with Jake’s support. She
was there as an expert on hand, if needed. Fun fact: she began midwifery school
and got pregnant with her first the same year I was born. That’s some
experience, right there!
Other Fun Notes:
- The four have been born at:
38 Weeks + 1 Day
40 W + 3 D
40 W + 4 D
41 W + 3 D (going with a later possible due date gets 41 W exactly)
- ·
We now have two spring birthdays (April) and two
fall birthdays, plus 5 summer birthdays (parents and boys).
- ·
#1, 3, and 4 were born on Sundays
- ·
#2, 3, 4 were born at 3:45am, 2:44am, and 2:52am
respectively. Apparently, I’m a night birther ever since having other children
in the house!
- ·
The first inkling I had it might be labor was
10pm, not being entirely sure for another couple of hours. She was born just
under 5 hours after that first slightly painful twinge though.
- Fast labors ARE more intense, for sure. I see
how it could have been overwhelming. Thankfully, this wasn't my first
rodeo and I had lots of "tricks in my tool bag", so to speak!
- ·
The midwife and assistant arrived just 15
minutes before her head was delivered. I don’t like to make anyone wait! 😊
- ·
She came in the middle of the night of the middle
night (4th of 7) of my mom’s visit!!
All of the girls have been great with the transition, but Sophia, almost 5 1/2, has been a super big helper!
We welcome Anastasia Rose
Born April 7, 2019, at 2:52AM
Weight: 8 pounds 9 ounces
Length: 21 inches
Our crew! Joel (15 1/2), Michael (15 1/2), Sophia (5 1/2 this month), Lydia (4 this month), Caledonia (2 1/2 next month), Anastasia (4 days)
The NEW little sister!
